Stubborn from day -38

Aug 02 2011 Published by under LifeTrajectories

This second kid is going to be a challenge. How do I know that, because she is already making things tough. She won't flip and has decided that she enjoys jamming her head into my wife's ribs in the same spot day in and day out. We've done just about everything to get this thing turn upside-down, save for moving to Australia.

Last week we even went in to do the "manual version" of the flip where two doctors try to move the kid from the outside using more external force than should ever be applied to a pregnant lady. Picture trying to turn a football in an inner-tube filled with old Jello. The look of pain my wife gave me on the second try was one I had forgotten existed and hasn't surfaced other than during her first labor. Needless to say, that was the end of that procedure and we've become fairly resigned to having this kid under the knife. Sometimes the plan just doesn't go the way you saw it from the beginning.

And then there is the kid who is already here. The Wee One has been sensing the coming storm and recently decided that her tummy hurt just like Mom's, culminating in the redecoration of our local coffee shop's walkway this morning. We're trying to find that delicate territory between making her feel loved while the focus shifts away from her in the coming weeks and she assaults the very fiber of our sanity with a new combative attitude that she has been honing for a month or so. As has been described more elegantly elsewhere, there is a point where you question whether the new addition to the family is going to snap all the threads of routine we have carefully weaved to function with the schedules we juggle.

We'll know soon enough because we have official been booked for the OR in less than two weeks. The concept that there will soon be another child in our life and we will be starting from scratch is so abstract right now, it may as well be the Higgs Boson.

I think I can make out the head.

We're not ready but you never are. Tomorrow is my last scheduled event until classes start. I've cleared my calendar, off-loaded some travel on the people in my lab and I'm bracing for impact. If we get through tomorrow at noon, we'll have nothing between us and baby.

Good and terrifying all at once.

8 responses so far

  • odyssey says:

    As a father of three I can tell you you will survive. You won't know how you're surviving, or at times feel like you really are, but you will. Good luck!

  • Lab Rockstar says:

    Congratulations! The miracle of life! Way to incubate, Ms. PLS.

  • Patchi says:

    Good luck!!!!

    I've been through the knife twice and the post-op is rough. What I learned the hard way was that less meds is best (the narcotic stuff they give for the side effects of the epidural will make mommy and baby sleepy and nursing more difficult). Getting up and walking around as soon as the doctor/nurse gives the OK is essential to cut the recovery period from 4 weeks to 2. This time you'll be walking the hospital hallways AFTER the baby comes and as my husband would probably tell you: ignore the "it hurts" and "I'm not ready" moans and the pitiful eyes. Either I was a lot more pitiful the first time or Dada toughened up the second time around I don't know...

    And I must have been doing pretty good (or the meds were stronger than I thought), as I told Dada he could go to a seminar 2 hours after delivery, he was supposed to be hosting the speaker.

  • Dr. Dad, PhD says:

    I've got two, and your story sounds remarkably similar. To echo oddysy, you will survive (but I learned my lesson and will stop at 2 - I don't want us to be outnumbered). And while I'd like to disagree, we found that pre-partum stubbornness does translate to post-partum personality (much to our chagrin).

    My son also had a little bit of a hard time adjusting. We ended up getting a doll for my youngest son so he could "practice" taking care of a younger brother. Two years later I wonder if it worked out too well - every morning he still hops into his younger brother's crib so he can snuggle with him in the morning. It's cute now, but it was a bit terrifying when his brother was 6 months old....

  • Congratulations and best of luck integrating kidlet #2 into your carefully honed routine!

  • Namnezia says:

    "there is a point where you question whether the new addition to the family is going to snap all the threads of routine we have carefully weaved to function with the schedules we juggle."

    It will, but you'll adjust and build new routines.

    Good luck!

  • CoR says:

    Echoing what they said above. It's difficult, schedules change, you adapt.

  • Oh I"m so glad you've given us an update. I was starting to wonder as I knew you were due after I was. Fingers crossed that WeeTwo will turn, staying in downward dog got babygirl to flip.

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