Slide templates and bride's maids dresses

Why do administrators insist on slide templates when they tell ask you to give a talk to other administrators? And WHY do they find the most brutally awful template ever created that requires you to mess with every fucking one of your slides after you drag your normal slides in? Is this some admin version of a bad bride's maid dress that makes their talk better looking next to your Pollock-like background? Are they TRYING to make me kill as much time as possible in prep for a worthless meeting? WTF?

11 responses so far

  • Dude, you know you're allowed to refuse, right? You can just be all like, "Oh, my slides are in a different program and there is no time. So sorry!" This is fucken academia, not the motherfucken military.

  • Karen says:

    Or, you could use your own template. I give just a few presentations a year, but I generally use my own template (a VERY muted background image with NO stuff around the edges).

  • Rob Knop says:

    Worthless meetings do not attain their true potential unless they also suck up time and cognitive resevoir all out of proportion to their actual footprint on the calendar.

  • BugDoc says:

    "Are they TRYING to make me kill as much time as possible in prep for a worthless meeting?" The answer is yes.

  • proflikesubstance says:

    I only need to use a template for this one presentation for the upper admin, it's not a normal thing. They have, however, gone to great lengths to ensure we have the "proper" template. I'm not sure I could convincingly decline at this point.

  • Best solution, don't use any slides at all. Write everything on the blackboard, sorry, whiteboard. It holds their attention much better than Death By Powerpoint.

  • fusilier says:

    [shuffles up with a walker]

    I learned to make slides with a 35mm camera and Ektachrome film, which I processed myself. That meant I had not choice about "templates." It was three lines of black type on a plain white (or maybe light blue) background.

    So just say that your thesis advisor made you make your slides that way and you are afraid to change things.

    James 2:24

    [shuffles off to the audience]

  • proflikesubstance says:

    If it makes you feel any better, I have a slide carousel sitting on one of my shelves. It's dusty as hell and has moved more times in the last 10 years than it has been used, but it's there.

  • Wow. I feel the hurt from all the way over here. Maybe if they cut education funding enough, some of these template-making people will get fired? Just looking on the bright side.

  • Ink says:

    LMAO. Definitely the Pollock thing.

    (Also? Ha ha re: the feed. I had that coming.)

  • proflikesubstance says:

    (Also? Ha ha re: the feed. I had that coming.)

    Could let you slip out of there that easily 🙂

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